Friday, October 21, 2005

My New Watch

I have a new watch - it is a watch and it is new and it has a square white face and brown straps.
I won it in a contest.
Not a pie-eating contest, not a sleeping contest. A real contest.

I wore my new watch one day and everyone liked it.
But my old watch didnt like my new watch.
So it got angry.
And stopped working.

Now I have to wear my new watch all the time.
Cause my options have gone - my old watch got jealous and stopped working.

This story has multiple morals :
1. Old watches are jealous of new watches.
2. Old watches should not express their jealousy by stopping work - its detrimental to their own well-being.
3. I gained a watch, I lost a watch => net amount of watches == constant => law of thermodynamics is proved (don't know which one though)
4. If you are still reading this, you are in a worse state than I am => accept my sympathies.
5. If you are STILL reading this.........

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Sunday, October 09, 2005

The Perfect Proposal

He had been wanting to do this for a very long time now. He liked her, in fact, he loved her... and tonight he was going to tell her....

It was all planned out .... he had picked out the perfect dress for her, was sending it over with a note saying "I would love to see you wearing this at dinner tonight", take her out for dinner in the most posh restaurant in the city, let the waiters serve champagne with an engagement ring in her glass.... it would be the perfect night, the perfect proposal. The restaurant booking had been done, the dress had been bought, the waiters had been forewarned, he had learned a romantic poem to recite to her :


Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.


He read the lines... he heard his voice say them out loud as he practiced in front of a mirror... and he realized how much this meant to him. He thought back on all their times spent together... their first meeting, when he had been too busy staring at her best friend to notice her.... then after 30 minutes noticing how she shyly brushed her hair off her face, and then her eyes crinkling with amusement at his amateurish attempts at impressing her friend. He had gotten angry at her then for making him look stupid, but now he knew he was only angry with himself for being soo stupid.

They had started out as friends, the hi-and-bye variety. Then one fine day, he called her to wish her on her birthday, and she called him a few days later to ask for some notes, and then phone conversations became a regular affair. He called her every night at 11 p.m. and they often spoke till 2-3 a.m. about everything and nothing - about life, and movies and songs and family, and philiosphy, and the past and the future and the garbage bin down the street and the state of the education system and the perfect tea and..... After a few months, they started studying together, and going out for coffee and conversations, and then movies.... He loved the way she was when she was with him - very demure, very sweet - she didn't even talk to other guys, but she trusted him - as if he was the best guy in the whole world and she knew already how he felt about her.

6 months passed by, they passed out from college, joined jobs in different cities, and then started the daily chat routines and Google Talk once a week.... and phone conversations sometimes...

And now they were meeting after a year of work - a year when they hadn't seen each other. And as he practised his lines in front of the mirror, he realized how happy he was, how excited, how thrilled. He loved her, and he was going to see her again after a whole year. And he was going to propose and they were going to get married, and live happily ever after. He would see her everyday morning at breakfast, and everyday night at dinner - life would be perfect.


They met at the restaurant and she looked even more prettier in the dress than he had imagined....and he again marvelled at how perfect life was going to be. Surely the fact that she wore the dress only confirmed that she liked him too. They ordered, and he asked the waiter to dedicate "Everything I do" by Bryan Adams to her, and she blushed and smiled sweetly and his heart soared with pleasure. She then announced that she had news : She had been transferred to the city where he was staying and they could now keep meeting, and it was like icing on the cake.

The food arrived - shrimp, pasta, salad, and the champagne... and when she looked down into the glass and saw the ring, she shrieked with delight !!! Yes she loved him too !!! And she was soooo happy !!! She got soo excited - she held his hands, stood up, and started jumping for joy !! The waiters all came around to congratulate them and she was soo happy she started dancing, still holding his hands, and people started watching them, and the waiters started smiling and clapping their hands ....

And he was shocked !!! Where was the sweet shy girl who he had fallen in love with? Who was this bold female who would dance so vulgarly in front of a clapping crowd !! How much had she changed in just 1 year !!!

And how was he ever going to break up with her ???



Inspite of all his plans, it wasn't the perfect night after all.